Mayo. Yes.

Listen.  I like mayonnaise.  (Even though I didn't realize it had two "n"s in it.)  People have a problem with the mayo.  People are always hating on the mayo.  I don't understand this.  Mayo is goood.  Miracle Whip is better.  Seriously!  Even the four people who do like mayonnaise turn their noses up at MW.  Freaks.  It's good stuff.  Know what else is good?  Macaroni salad.  Very mayonnaise-y.  Very creamy.  And, of course, macaroni-y.  My favorite part of the macaroni salad is the pimentos.  Yum!  They are dispersed few and far between, so they're a real treat when you get one in your forkful.  Or is it "on your forkful?"  Who says "forkful?"  Anyway, you should give mayonnaise a chance.  It's creamy, smooth, and tangy.  And how can you not respect a condiment that is an emulsion?