How to clean your coffee maker

From your balcony, go inside your apartment, and remember you need to get your clothes out of the dryer and switch the other stuff from the washer.  Grab quarters and head downstairs to the laundry room.  Run into your neighbor, who is hauling a giant basket of clean laundry up the stairs.  He asks you, "Laundry day for you, too?"  You reply, "Every day," and throw your arms up in a rock-n-roll fashion, because you are that cool.  Scoop clothes from dryer to basket, being careful to not wad up the important stuff.  Transfer stuff from washer to dryer.  Encounter minor issue with red bra tangling itself with drawstrings of giant knit shorts.  Encounter bigger issue with son's new-used kindergarten uniform shirt trailing super-long thread and wrapping around most every other item in washer.  Somehow solve this problem and throw away what seems to be eleventy-seven feet of red thread.  Finally head back upstairs with basket of laundry and dump it all on bed.  Gather load of towels, go downstairs and put them in washer.  Feed more quarters and it feels like you are feeding away your life.  When you return to your apartment, remove clean coffee pot, lid and filter-holding accessory from dishwasher.  Place filter in filter-holding accessory.  Pour a bunch of white vinegar in pot.  Fill the rest with tap water.  Pour the vinegar-water concoction into the coffee maker, making sure to spill quite a bit of it onto the counter.  But don't stop there:  go all the way and cause a good amount of it to flow onto the cabinet drawer fronts and down onto your foot.  Sop up mess, then turn on coffee maker.  Listen to the vinegar-water brew and drip down into the pot.  Pour another glass of girly pink sparkly wine and eat six bites of BLT pasta salad straight from the container.  Take a break and come out to the balcony to listen to music and type away on the laptop.  Think about Twin Peaks, and fire up the stream and watch 20 minutes of Season 2, Episode 10.  Return indoors, dump out vinegar-water from pot and rinse pot with tap water several times.  Remove filter from filter-holding accessory and marvel at the few coffee grounds visible, but imagine all the stuff ending in -scale that is probably also trapped in there.  Throw away filter.  Rinse filter-holding accessory.  Fill pot with fresh tap water, and being super-careful not to spill much water this time, fill coffee maker.  Start brewing.  Head downstairs to retrieve still warm family clothing from dryer.  Note that all three new-used kindergarten uniform shirts seem unharmed, despite thread incident reported earlier.  Throw freshly-washed towels into dryer, breathing a heavy sigh of relief that this is the final step of the final load of the evening.  Trudge back upstairs with clean clothes, note that water-water is still brewing, and head to the ladies room.  After relieving, hand-washing and thinking "I should really clean this sink...again," revisit the kitchen.  Open refrigerator door and marvel at all the food inside.  Take a mental snapshot, because you realize that once your kids return to you tomorrow morning, the stockpile will quickly diminish.  Pour another glass of pink sparkle, eat three more bites of BLT pasta salad from the container, then dump out pot full of water-water.  Rinse pot 1.5 times and refill with fresh water.  Spill shit-tons of it while pouring it into coffee maker.  Realize you neglected to rinse filter-holding device and do so at this time.  Clean up water from counter and start coffee maker.  Go back outside and notice you have a text message!  Get excited because people like you!  Only it's an unrecognized number.  Text exchange follows:

859---1277: Hey.
Me: Hello.
859---1277: U a girl?
Me:  Am a raccoon.
859---1277: U a girl
Me:  A girl raccoon.
859---1277: How old are u?
859---1277: U handicaped?
Me:  I am likely old enough to be your mother and do not mock me form my mental issues.
859---1277: U ware a diaper?
859---1277: Can u be my mommy please?
Me:  No thanks.
859---1277: Tex me.
859---1277: U know anybody that can?
Me:  Try Craigslist.  Good luck with your endeavors.

Get bored with freaky texting stranger and head back to the 'Flix, where Twin Peaks awaits.  Watch several minutes of Season 2, Episode 10, then go inside to check on your coffee maker cleaning project.  Empty pot of water, rinse pot and filter-holder, refill pot with fresh water, pour into coffee maker, and spill a fair amount.  Clean up water and realize - not for the first time - that you would never make it as a server.  Start coffee maker for the final water brew.  Come back outside and realize your butt is numb from so much sitting, and that your towels are likely dry by now, but since you're pretty lazy, sit and think about how much you're looking forward to Autumn and how your hands are starting to get dry and itchy already.  Then think about your friend who is having a good time, hopefully, at a photo shoot at this very moment.  Feel excited for him and hope he gets great pictures.  Be jealous.  Return to Twin Peaks.  Get excited because David Duchovny is in Episode 11, and pretend you haven't seen the series previously.  Yawn, rub let eye, and realize you're getting tired.  Then realize you should keep your fingers away from your eyes.  Squint and blink several times.  Go inside, dump out final pot of hot water.  Wash pot, filter-holding accessory, and lid by hand.  Wipe down all aspects of the coffee maker, using semi-soapy washcloth.  Go to laundry room and retrieve towels, pausing at mailboxes on your way back upstairs.  You think about about getting today's mail, but decide against it, since you know it's just more bills.  Upon returning to the apartment, you immediately fold this load and the night's previous load of towels and put them away.  You gaze with astonishment and with a feeling of accomplishment, at the fully stocked linen closet.  Then you snicker when you realize, like so many other things, once your kids return to you tomorrow morning, the stockpile will quickly diminish.  Pour the rest of the bottle of pink sparkle into your glass, knowing full well you will end up pouring most of it out when you go to bed.  Vow to finish Episode 11.  After about 20 minutes, move inside, because you're so tired, watch the rest of Episode 11 on the couch on the laptop and not the TV, since TV = sleep, and you really want to finish this episode.  There you will likely fall asleep until the morning light peeks through your ugly vertical blinds.  And that, my friends, is how to clean your coffee maker!