(I know I use that phrase a lot when Cameron starts saying it.)
I think I've finally hit that mark...that place where I am just getting sick of my body. Sick of how my clothes fit. Sick of how my top fat hangs over my waistline and my bottom fat makes my underwear roll down and strangle my c-section incision. Sick that my little sister, who just had a baby four months ago, looks amazing. Nearly flat belly. I'm happy for her, but it sure makes me look like a fatass! Not that I don't deserve my fat - I've been completely gluttonous. Packages of chocolate chips, of Hershey's Bliss. Countless cookies. Enough Dr. Pepper to fill a swimming pool. I'm also sick of the fact that a brisk walk to Cam's bus stop makes me winded. Sick that I'm putting the health of my kids' main caregiver at risk.
So, I'm starting to make some changes. Nothing drastic, but baby steps. I'm not drinking nearly as much soda. Some days, none at all. But if I have one or two, I'm not going to beat myself up. Hardly any chocolate. Making better food choices in general. And I vow to start walking. Despite the cold. Despite the fact that I'd rather be working. Despite the fact that I'm tired. Despite the fact that I'm lazy.
I just want to look and feel better. I don't look and feel like myself right now. I think I just might embarrass myself and disgust everyone by posting pictures of myself. Just don't know if I'll do it now, at the beginning, or like at midpoint as a comparison. Still thinking on it.
So, that's the deal.
2 comments:
Melzer-- Baby steps is the best way to start. I'm proud of you for starting at all because it's so hard to take that initial step. I know.
I promised Rylie this morning that after Finn is here, I won't be fat anymore. I know how you feel, sista.
I'm cheerin' for you. :)
You know I'm behind you 100 percent!!! It's amazing how much better you will feel, which gets addictive.
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